Emma—Age 25

Because we love our unborn children, we are not having them. Growing up, I always joined in on conversations about how many kids I wanted in the future. I always said I wanted them because that’s what you do, and to say otherwise would have been unnatural– but I never felt a desire to be a mother emotionally.

At 25, I am newly married, and I still l haven’t had “baby fever”. But I have internalized that the feelings must be strong and loving enough that they deserve respect, and as a society, we should fight for providing a sustainable world in which to create families. 

I don’t believe we can afford to wait on government to solve this problem that we as citizens of the industrial world over generations upon generations have created through our lifestyles. For this reason, my husband I have gone vegan, we try to opt for the bike or walking as transportation as much as possible, and we hold strong to our conviction that because we love our unborn children, we are not having them. This has been a difficult pill to swallow for my own parents. My comments about actively resisting any urge to have children that might surface between us as a couple have been met with blank stares from friends and family, followed by changes of subject. But this is a moral choice. Having fewer children and making sometimes uncomfortable lifestyle changes is what it takes to create a live-able future for the children being born today, and these lifestyle changes require social support. This requires removing the “selfish” label on childless, or single-child families. It requires education, reproductive planning support, and fighting for a woman’s right to be a respected, and decisive voice in her own family planning. It takes a village…